I hooked up with my Texas women's cult last night.I had looked for phone numbers in the city's fat phonebook earlier this week and found only one of them listed. After a tongue lashing for "friendship negligence" she immediately suggested an impromptu dinner gathering so we could all catch up.
Rejuvenated, I hung up the phone and anticipated a real meal.
There's seems to be a discrepancy in this apartment as to what qualifies as a meal. The kitchen IS small and the cooking utensils limited. But I am bound and determined to find a small rice cooker--so I can demonstrate adaptability and acceptance.
I have a bit of trouble with acceptance--so she gets it honest. I taught her to treat people fairly and be honest so you start each day with a clear conscience. But I failed to effectively cover the finer points of interaction with those individuals who are somewhat unfamiliar with these concepts. But, I'm still dealing with that one myself.
Honesty is a tough one. Human nature makes us see what we want to see and hear what we want to hear. And perhaps to have a tendency to say what we think the other person wants to hear. It's just easier and causes fewer uncomfortable situations.
I've always been accused of blunt honesty. However, here lately, I open my mouth and my brain is still sorting out the proper words.
My daughter hasn't hesitated to bring this to my attention on several occasions. She's a bit impatient, like her mother.
As I maneuver through midlife, I realize it is more important to choose your words carefully. The message gets across in a very diplomatic sense and there! It's on the table. It's like labor's deep cleansing breath.
And just like the end result of labor, it creates a much different world.
6 comments:
I have found, as I get older, that truth is, in most cases, a relative thing. My truth may not be the same as your truth. If you are being honest about how you feel and express that honesty, you are better off than trying to tell someone else what their truth should be.
Lots of food for thought here, mizmell.
The pun was unintentional. But it works.
Very nicely put MizMell. Thank you for making me really think hard today. :-)
Isn't it interesting how some people get more tactful as they grow older, more sensitive to what a blunt instrument language can be? I'd like to think the same has happened to me (I used to be a terror for cutting people expressing what I perceived as ignorance or stupidity down to size. Or just plain down) and that I've got the nasty tongue in my head curbed. On the other hand, given the right (or wrong) occasion, it still comes leaping straight out...
"However, here lately, I open my mouth and my brain is still sorting out the proper words. "
Uh, me too.
great post.
Honesty vs. tact is something I struggle with constantly. Sigh.
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