I like the color.

After all that sanding and patching, the entire wall looks like concrete. But its supposed to be textured. It has little flecks of granite than sometimes catch the light of the morning sun and sparkle just a bit. I love sparkles!

My other half calls it "definitely different" and says the walls "look pretty wild."

At any rate, I finished the first coat about 5pm and left the plastic dropcloths down, because I will be painting again. Those walls sucked up that paint and I have scraped the bottom of the bucket.

I'm off for more supplies!

Color me "Hooked"

My favorite place to shop is becoming Lowe's. I can spend a couple of hours quite easily and lose myself in daydreams of our home "with just a little work."

I have putty knives, sanding blocks and this really neat spackling that goes on bubblegum pink and then dries very smooth and white. I think I may be just a bit addicted to the tools and gadgets!



Three days in the hall of puttying and sanding has put me almost there. My other half removed the last door trim yesterday for me--the hallway has five doors! I plan on doing the last touch-up of sanding today and then I get to paint!

It's really beautiful to see white walls transformed by color!

Just Unplug It

I haven't always been a hermit.

In my previous life, I scarcely had time to think! Honest to God, I'd get half-dressed--run one kid to school--then finish dressing , fix my hair and make-up-- run the other kid to school. After that I could go to my 8+ hour a day job. Busy, busy, busy.

Lunch was an event. Happy hour was a social among friends at least twice a week. Most evenings were eaten up by school and extracirricular activities---as well as most weekends. How did I keep the house clean, laundry done and groceries in the house? I really have no idea... but it was done.

I've been in this area not quite 5 years now. There is no delivery I am aware of other than Fed Ex and UPS. Kids are gone. Just me and my other half, the four dogs... and the big ass cat.

There are days I can't seem to get anything done because of the phone ringing. I honestly have relatives that call 3 to 4 times a day--or more!

I've solved that problem (thanks to a suggestion from my other half). I unplug the phones and let voicemail catch it. Works great!

Maybe I should cut off the Nextel as well...

Life is a Trade-Off

I am constantly amazed at the number of offers from service providers that require a contract or service commitment. What ever happened to earning a customer's loyalty? Seems to me if you were doing things right, there wouldn't be a need for a contract or commitment from the customer. Call me old-fashioned, but back in the day, you had customers because they were treated fairly and you offered a good product and/or service. I challenge you to find that today!

I mentioned many times how I live way off the beaten path... but have you any idea what it is like to just have internet connectivity in my neck of the woods? I have satellite internet. My monthly rate is twice of most cable providers (no cable here!) and my bandwidth is less than half. But... I have no choice... absolutely NO CHOICE. The old phone lines have probably been here a hundred years and they hum upon occasion. No DSL either.

Consider this a "count your blessings" moment: Those of you out there who enjoy the modern conveniences that are foreign in my area-- how close is your closest neighbor? Do you hear sirens and boomboxes?

I hear the beagle next door in hot pursuit and need binoculars to see my mailbox. Peace and quiet.

And I bet my neighbors don't even hear me scream when I have to reset my satellite transmitter.

My Slice of Heaven

God knows I love a challenge... I think that's why I am where I am.

Each hurdle is greater than the last. The sense of accomplishment is wonderful, but I just need some breathing room between hurdles.

Is that too much to ask???

This week, I am a wallpaper stripper, hole-patcher and painter.

I promise, I'll share pictures...

Granny's Pear Honey

Seems the men folk have been visiting in my neighborhood about my Pear Honey. I recently shared it with a neighbor who has two big beautiful pear trees... this recipe will make very good of them!

This is my Granny's recipe. I have such wonderful, fond memories of making this with her and my mother, so I made it a tradition at my home in Texas with my two daughters.

We planted two pear trees when the girls were very young. Once the trees began to bear fruit, we'd draft the neighborhood girls to help with the chopping.

As years passed, friends became conveniently indisposed when the pears began to ripen! My Kitchenaid mixer--with the proper attachments--has made this a manageable task alone.

I must admit, I do miss the visiting that accompanies any group project

Granny's Pear Honey
3 lbs fresh pears
5 1/2 cups sugar
1 tsp lemon juice
8 oz. can crushed pineapple

Core, peel and finely chop all pears. Add all ingredients in 6 quart pot. Bring to boil. Simmer 40 minutes, stirring over low heat.
Spoon into hot jars and seal. (I usually run my jars through the dishwasher and time the making of the pear honey so it coincides with the end of the dishwasher's cycle.)




Delicious on hot biscuits or toast. Wonderful on a ham or grilled pork chops.
Enjoy!

Blue's Birthday

Yesterday was Blue's Birthday--he's a whopping 7 years old.

Blue was so small when I first saw him that he fit in my husband's hand and was able to concealed comfortably behind his back. He has since grown to 22 pounds.

My girls were hesitant to accept him right away... they were still mourning the loss of our 13 year old German Shepherd. Besides that, Blue grunted like a pig and had a tendency to sneeze right in your face (still does!).

He is a bit of a pig--my oldest has dubbed him a "food whore"--the only animal I have ever seen that will eat anything and everything. He stands by the island in the kitchen anytime I am cooking. He is so sure I'll drop something!


If he's not eating, chances are he's taking a nap. And yes, he snores.

He made the trip--and the transition--from Texas to Virginia with me. He's my daily companion and confidante.

I forget where I heard this, but it is oh so true: "If you want undying love and affection--get a dog."

Insanity?

Ever get the feeling that life is on fast forward?

I have been doing the usual fall cleaning and found my journal tucked way beneath a pile of neatly folded clothes that I just know I can fit into again one day. The clothes part is not so disturbing. I have come to understand that I will not be a size 6 again. If I hang in there and behave I may just be an 8 again one day soon...

When I found the journal, of course I sat right down in the floor and read the entries. Last one was done on my birthday a year ago! I had written how delighted I was because my other half actually baked me a birthday cake--from scratch. A wonderfully delicious carrot cake with cream cheese frosting! I didn't get one this year--not that I NEED it or anything. I just have all these photos of me all through life taken with my birthday cake (see October 4 post), so somewhere in my subconcious, I feel a bit cheated if I don't get a birthday cake. I started to buy one--but that would be all wrong.

I read on... the thoughts and issues that consumed the pages are the very same thoughts and issues that plague me on a day to day basis... a year later, no less.

Was it Einstein or Mark Twain that said "Insanity is doing the same thing day after day expecting different results?"

He Killed A Village

Have you ever seen anything like this?

My other half dug it up a day or so after filling the hole in the ground with gasoline. He finds it amusing that I did not know yellow jackets built nests in the ground. This one looks like a village with all its layers!

I guess I'm still noticing and appreciating the differences between living behind six-foot privacy fences in the city and living where you need binoculars to see your neighbors. Needless to say, I appreciate the latter.

The leaves are turning and early mornings are a bit chilly. When I put the fat cat out this morning, I couldn't help but notice how beautifully clear the sky is at 5am. I could clearly see constellations! When my youngest was interested in astrology, we'd have to drive out to the deer lease in an effort to escape the lights of the city.

There's talk of snow... I'm doubtful at this point. But, the talk will push me into getting those loose ends tied up. I think I'll dig up those two big beautiful hibiscus today and place them in my bedroom to brighten my winter days. I have a south window that heats things up just enough to make them bloom all winter.

A Crone is Born

Beautiful young people are accidents of nature
but beautiful old people are works of art. - Eleanor Roosevelt -

I've done a bit of research and it appears I am a crone. Actually, hag is also accurate given my age and menopausal state. I'm afraid slang definitions have taken over for the later word and ruined its chances of ever being uttered in a positive light.

I'm not 50 yet, but I see it in the not so far off distance.

“…you only begin to discover the difference between what you really are, your real self, and your appearance, when you get a bit older…A whole dimension of life suddenly slides away and you realize that what in fact you’ve been using to get attention has been what you look like…It’s a biological thing. It’s totally and absolutely impersonal. It really is a most salutary and fascinating thing to go through, shedding it all. Growing old is really extraordinarily interesting.” (Quoted by Germaine Greer: The Whole Woman)

I'm shedding it, for sure. I look the same to me, except for the gray hair and a few ever-growing lines. I realize, though, that I am now the new and improved me.

“She would be a woman who did not exist to embody male sexual fantasies or rely upon a man to endow her with identity and social status, a woman who did not have to be beautiful, who could be clever, who would grow in authority as she aged.” (The Whole Woman).

I’ve always spoken honestly… some may even call it bluntly. But I accept responsibility for my thoughts and make a real effort to communicate objectively, without blame or disrespect.

I realize that we each are responsible for our own happiness. Self acceptance and forgiveness is at the very core of this. Having done whatever necessary to heal my own wounds, I now have a deeper compassion for others.

“Weaving a cocoon out of the substance of one’s own life is the necessary prerequisite for the emergence of the psyche: in withdrawing we create a way out….Going down into the subconscious and coming back out again are vital parts of the soul’s search for meaning…which is what the crone represents. Through having to complete nearly impossible tasks, the Crone earns her healing power. Turning away from a world to discover whether you are really alive is unquestionably painful. But it is in the conscious acceptance of loneliness- when there is nothing else to do- that a natural process of healing occurs.” (Vicki Noble: Motherpeace Tarot).

Let's Get Real

I feel like crap today. I did yesterday as well. I barked and snapped and my sarcasm had a real sharp edge. There were several times my other half looked at me like I had three heads.
In spite of the fact that I didn't have the first Diet Pepsi and limited myself to 2 mere cups of coffee, I am feeling a tremendous sinus headache this morning. And to make matters worse, I'm going to have go out and face the general public--and read labels--just to improve my outlook today. That is, if I can find the energy to shower and dress.
I am proud of the fact that I have acknowledged to myself and to others that I don't feel good and have duly informed them, as a result, I may have the tendency to go off. I know I'm blunt and straight-forward but today things may go a degree or so more honest -- or raw.
Armed with this information, I declined the breakfast invitation from my mother-in-law this morning. When she called this morning, to tell me she had started the biscuits (she lives a mile away), I very openly admitted that when I don't feel good I have less patience and more sarcasm, and because of this I felt it best my other half go by himself. She told me her two sisters were coming. My husband's brother and his wife are there for the weekend, too. I sent banana nut muffins and some pear honey I put up yesterday.

I think I'll make some Comforting Chicken Soup.

Morning Coffee

For nearly two weeks the White House and rebellious Republican senators have fought publicly over whether President Bush's plan for detaining and interrogating terrorism suspects would give a president too much authority.

Many believe this is legislation Republicans likely will use on the campaign trail to assert that Democrats want to coddle terrorists.

The American people have been tortured enough... please, no more.

New information released today is just another indication of how human nature has a tendency to just take things for granted. A group of researchers believe, based on the clothing she is wearing, Mona Lisa was either pregnant or had recently given birth. Evidently the veil-like head garment that she wears (the veil that many of us have never even noticed) can be considered maternity wear. Seems the 500 year old paint is holding up fine, but the poplar board that Leonardo used as his canvas is warping just a tad.

Time has tendency to slip away, but here's proof that some of us seem to have an unfair overabundance. This lady in the UK has knitted a "to scale" English flower garden.
Click here for a gallery of pictures from the knitted garden!


Fall is definitely here, casting long afternoon shadows.

Give Peace A Chance

I caught something interesting on VH1 last night: The Drug Years. It was a 4-hour documentary that explored drug use decade by decade.

I had read about about the observations of Timothy Leary and found that part interesting. The 60s review was the most entertaining with it's laid-back pot smokers and love for one another.

Things started going sour with the Vietnam war when heroin was made available to soldiers and so many returned to the US as addicts. This documentary hinted that the government not only knew of the drug use during the war, but assisted in making it readily available. That's disturbing, to say the least.

Another thing that really rattled me was watching the protests and demonstrations. I was taken with the outpouring of genuine concern for the direction of the country and the insistence that "Love and Peace" were the preferred order of the day for so many. Granted they were high or getting high or whatever, but the fact remains they had the gumption, even in their somewhat altered states, to recognize what is fair and just and what is not... and they took a stand. Some even lost their life at the hands of those who just wouldn't hear what they were trying to say. (sigh!)

The world is pretty much the same now. We have a conflict that is suspect. We are still a nation of drug users--and the government still doesn't recognize the plight of the common man.
Nearest I can figure, the message of those who demostrated and marched somehow got lost along the way. History is repeating itself and America is turning a deaf ear.

Hell Freezes Over

"Discretion is being able to raise your eyebrow instead of your voice."

I lived in Texas in my previous life. I have been back in Virginia for almost 5 years now.

In fact, there have been numerous changes in my life in the past 5 years. My old friends in Texas would get a fit of the giggles if they caught a glimpse of "a day in the life."

My daily companions are four-legged. I live out in the boonies, so to speak. I can leave my keys in the car. I'd really have to think about where I've put the keys to the house. Nope, I don't lock the doors.

But the biggest change is probably that I've learned to (sometimes) keep my mouth shut. I'm learning to pick my battles, or better yet, recognizing the difference between a brush fire and a forest fire.

I've always admired those who could keep it all together so eloquently and never get ruffled. Ann Richards was that way (see last post). So is Bill Clinton.

Perhaps the path to this type of lifestyle is in doing the right thing... to provide the greatest good for the greatest number.

"The here and now is all we have..."

"The here and now is all we have, and if we play it right it's all we'll need. -- Ann Richards - September 1, 1933 - September 13, 2006

After a short but valiant battle with cancer, former Governor Ann Richards has died at her home in Austin, Texas. She had just celebrated her 73rd birthday a couple of weeks ago.

Richards was the quintessential Texas woman, with a sassy homespun charm, sharp wit and tough pioneer spirit. With bright silver hair, a weathered face and an affinity for cobalt blue suits and pearls, Richards was instantly recognizable to national television audiences.

One of her most notable public appearances was in 1988 when Democratic National Chairman Paul Kirk asked her to be the keynote speaker at the party's national convention that summer. Her speech was to draw differences between the parties and take aim at a fellow Texan: Vice President George Bush, the GOP nominee for president.

Richards thrilled her national audience with some of her feminist humor on the ability of women to equal men: "Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did. She just did it backwards and in high heels."

What became memorable, though, was a line she delivered to show Bush was out of touch with the economic and family issues that were important to poor and middle class Americans.

"Poor George, he can't help it — he was born with a silver foot in his mouth," Richards said.

That speech set the stage for Richards to run for governor in 1990. As a Democratic politician, Richards' race for governor against Republican cowboy oilman Clayton Williams became a battle of the sexes. She was the image of the modern Texas woman, while Williams projected the cowboy aura of the state's heritage.

Williams was a cowboy who had become a millionaire oilman and had expanded his empire into telecommunications and banking. Richards played off his mistakes. Williams once compared bad weather to rape, saying there is nothing to be done about it, so "relax and enjoy it." He also refused to shake Richards' hand after she had criticized some of his business practices.

Her victory symbolically broke down gender barriers for a generation of Texas women who were seeking professional careers.

Richards labeled her administration the "New Texas," appointing more Hispanics, blacks and women to state boards and commissions than any previous governor. She pushed for increases in public education funding and promoted business expansion in the state.

A recovering alcoholic, Richards also pressed lawmakers to increase funding for drug and alcohol abuse treatment programs.

Polls showed Richards was the most personally popular governor in 30 years. Late in her term as governor, the Houston Chronicle asked Richards how she viewed her gubernatorial legacy.

"How about, 'She changed the economic future of Texas,'" Richards replied. "And that really beats what I feared my tombstone was going to say, and that was: 'She kept a really clean house.'"

During her first year in office, Richards signed a $2.7 billion tax bill to balance the state's budget. The state also adopted the lottery under her.

Her most notable achievement was opening the doors of government to people other than Anglos and men. About 44 percent of her appointees were female; 20 percent Hispanic; and 14 percent black. Her two predecessors in office had given more than 77 percent of their appointments to Anglo men.

Richards described herself as a "two-headed cow," a curiosity that corporate leaders allow through the door just so they can see her.

She could brag about getting General Motors to keep its Arlington plant open, as the company was partly motivated by a package of state incentives. She persuaded Southwestern Bell to move its corporate headquarters from St. Louis to San Antonio. She convinced computer giant Apple to consolidate its customer service operations in Williamson County.

Richards went into her 1994 re-election campaign against the younger Bush with the highest personal popularity ratings of any governor in 30 years. She questioned Bush's experience to serve as Texas governor and his criticism of her record. She called him "some jerk who's running for public office."

In her farewell news conference as governor, Richards said she was ready to move to the next phase of her life. The homemaker-turned-politician wanted to earn the money that would make her secure in retirement.

"Life is like a layer cake," Richards said. "You put one layer on top of the other, and whether you frost it or not is up to you. I'm looking forward now to a little frosting."

Official portrait and brief biography at the Texas State Library & Archives

Ann Richards on a motorcycle and more Richards photos (Texas State Library & Archives)
Quotations from Ann Richards (About Women's History)
Democratic National Convention Address by Ann Richards
Ann Richards buying the first Texas Lottery scratch-off ticket in 1992 (the Texas Lottery started during Richards' term as governor).
KVUE News / AP Story on life and death of Ann Richards

Perception vs. Reality

I've realized the mind will play tricks on you.

We all see things the way we WANT to see them. And we all see things through our own window, or viewpoint of the world (See photo: my favorite window).
What makes life interesting, or humorous, or a real challenge... has to do with what happens when we forget the simple fact that we are all not looking at life through the same window. Sounds simple enough to correct, doesn't it?

Just remember we all don't see things the same way. With that thought in memory, maybe no voices will raise and all patience will remain intact... no one will "lose it."
Another thing I have found to be very helpful is to "listen with the intent to understand, rather than with the intent to reply."
I'm even putting in a little 5-10 second delay before I speak, just to be sure.

Just Fix It

I read in the paper this morning scientists believe that global warming has caused the strange weather we've been experiencing.
It makes me absolutely ill to think that we are all responsible for Hurricane Katrina.
The religious right has stated that God was just punishing the sinners in Louisiana -- I doubt Washington D.C. would still be standing if that were the case! (Or Crawford, Texas for that matter).

I'm trying my best to stay off the old soapbox. It isn't easy.

I truly hope that everyone realizes what is at stake in this next election. Please don't wait for your neighbor's vote to make the difference. Step right up to the plate and cast your own. And please let it be your own. Don't be swayed by news propaganda or viewpoints of friends or family.
Please research candidates just as thoroughly as you would anything else you plan on being around for at least 4 years. Bear in mind also, how expensive the president is in terms of salary... and factor in the damage they may be capable of in 4 years time.
I'm pretty upset with the current state of affairs. Somewhat embarassed for the country as a whole.
What do you say... how about we just fix it?

Sir Walter Raleigh Goes Down

I'll never forget how horrified I was when I first heard my history professor, Mr. Trussell, quite nonchulantly refer to Sir Walter Raleigh as a pirate.
I grew up in Virginia. I have always loved history and spent a good portion of my childhood visiting all those wonderful museums that celebrated Virginia history. I remember peering through the glass cases at the old clothes and relics. Sir Walter Raleigh was a celebrated explorer. Never once did I see or hear the term "pirate" associated with his good name...
Until one Texas professor laid it all out. He explained his position once I confronted him after class. If I remember correctly, I think he was a bit amused with my reaction as well.
At any rate, Mr. Trussell explained that I had put Mr. Raleigh up on a pedestal and in doing so, had neglected to see some things. He went on to say this is not an uncommon practice -- for individuals such as myself to fail to realize that individuals like Sir Walter Raleigh are human just like the rest of us and indeed may possess character flaws and bad judgement.
Wow! Denial perhaps?
I guess we all see what we want to see. Then one day, it slaps us right in the face and there's no escape. No denial. Just piracy.
Yesterday, I discovered another pirate in someone I had believed had the utmost integrity. Tears slipped down my face as I silently cried.
Funny thing, I'm not sure if I was crying for them or for me.

TMI: Not a good thing.

I heard something the other day that really made me think. I overheard my uncle telling my mother that he was going to try and be more like me by staying out of other people's business.
He's right that I try to mind my own business. I've just grown very tired of all the mess. I really would prefer to NOT know all those little tidbits of information that feed the rumor mills and keep tongues wagging.
And in turn, maybe they'll leave me along. HA! Fat chance.
I was speaking to the husband of a close friend just yesterday. He was concerned by the inconsiderate curiousity of the local folks when inquiring about the recent death of her mother. He couldn't understand how folks weren't through probing until she was in tears.
Gossip. You see, they need the all the details to pass it on. If they were genuinely concerned, they would have been through after "I'm sorry" and "What can I do to help?"
You have to feel sorry for those who live for this stuff. They have no real life and live though the trials and tribulations of others. These are very sort who would go to the trouble of typing you an anonymous letter (or poem) to forewarn you of impending doom.
I steer clear of all things related... I don't want to know, don't need to know.
I think maybe maturity is knowing when to shut up. Or maybe learning which battles to pick.
I'll just keep busy here on this 26 acres with my dogs and my flowers.

My Women's Cult

I remember one day, back in my previous life, I got an invitation on the mail to visit with a group of women during one of their regularly scheduled meetings. Someone had recommended I'd be a good candidate for membership to this group. To this day, that someone is still a mystery.
At any rate, I went. I visited... and the rest is ancient history.
This photo was taken the last time we all got together back in 2003. I had travelled back to Texas for my youngest daughter's graduation from high school and that mischievious redhead (second from left on the back row) graciously put me up for two days. I remember we had dinner out one night (Gossip Night, I think they called it) and I got to catch one of the lunch meetings while I was in town also.
I miss them.
Small group, but all females. We really got together as often as possible and had such a good time just being female. We were do gooders too, though.
One such instance, we all had a day at a Habitat for Humanity all-female home build. That day, Ann had to slip out early because she had an appointment with her manicurist (first one on right, bottom row). I had my first (and only) experience putting in insulation that day.
Each year at Christmas we adopted a single-parent family and provided wrapped gifts for each family member. The year I divorced my husband of 18 years, I was tasked with delivering a trunkload of gifts to the chosen family. Looking back, I wonder if they all got together and decided it was just "my turn."
My youngest daughter, Jeni, is the one that deemed this group my "women's cult." Whatever it was, it helped me celebrate being me.