Driving Mizmell

It was just last Saturday that the city-girl daughter drove us both up the mountain to have breakfast at the Peaks of Otter lodge. It's truly beautiful--and about 10 degrees cooler!

After a mediocre breakfast (the food is not worthy of the landscape!) we walked around the lake for some photo ops.

I have photographs of her father holding her--just six weeks old--in this very spot. Were it not for the demands on my time--finishing up the last week of school--I would have dug them out and scanned the pictures for comparison. I know all my readers are highly creative, though. You get the general idea.

The city-girl has re-emerged as a rising tennis star. I was a serious tennis investor when she was in her teens. I'm happy to report that watching tennis is just as much fun (if not more so) when it is NOT highly competitive in nature.

I find it very refreshing these days to look at old things with a new perspective.

And next?

Tomorrow is the last day to meet with the adolescent boys who are my team members on my final project--to be presented on Monday evening. Two exams on Tuesday and I may be finally through.

And yes, there's an awards ceremony tomorrow evening. I should be receiving one for academic excellence... and I learned this evening, another for my networking studies.

Photos?

That's a difficult one, as I am the photographer in the family.

Its All On A Wheel

Trials are but lessons that you failed to learn presented once again,
so where you made a faulty choice before you now can make a better one,
and thus escape all pain that what you chose before has brought to you.

Meditations from A Course in Miracles.

Better Things Ahead

I never planted the hyacinths at the front walk. They appeared once I removed the fence--it had been there so long, the wire had relaxed into the earth and had to be dug from the ground. Once the area was cleaned though, daffodils and random tulips emerged.

When I traded my corporate job and house in the city for a an old farmhouse in the depths of rural America, there were a few who just couldn't manage to keep their opinions to themselves.

I remember.

They spoke their piece. Others merely shook their heads, acknowledging their complete inability to comprehend my choice.

But I was driven by what could be. I had a vision, right down to the last detail.

I've never been one concerned with pleasing the masses. I know that each individual is responsible for their own happiness.

I also know full well, someone will always have something to say. Rather than be upset with the talk, I'm happy to save someone else from the gossip-mongers--even if its only momentarily.

I'm also a very determined person. When I set my mind on something, it becomes a challenge to follow through to the end. I may complain a bit along the way, but I keep plowing along.

Since I went back to school, I've waded through assignments, juggled schedules and books. I've whined about biology but have become more ecologically aware.

And now, with just a few weeks from finishing my degree, I realize the unexpected benefit is I've learned a lot about myself in the process.

The Thrill of the Chase

Inevitably, something catches our eye.

And instinctively, we are in hot pursuit.

All thoughts are on achieving this one thing.

As the ultimate goal comes closer into view, we develop tunnel vision.

No one or nothing can stand in our way now.

All the excitement.
All the surge of emotions--both high and low--
with no thought beyond the chase.

No thought of what's next...

Reaching New Heights

Miss Jeni climbed atop a concrete picnic table
to photograph the Austin skyline.
She's completely enamored with the city.

I guess the old saying is true:
Unless you're at the top of the hill, the view is all the same.

Miss Jeni took this photograph
from a ledge overlooking Lake Austin.

Life is Meant To Be Party

Miss Jeni's bridal shower had a Mardi Gras theme...

Complete with a colorful champagne punch...

And an ample supply of nibbles.

All this creativity and skill was provided by her future sister-in-law.

We played games (including bridal pictionary) and
then did the old-school ritual of collecting bows
from packages to make the bride a hat. Lovely, isn't it?

Here's the happy couple. Don't they make a stunning pair?

Higher Ground

It's so refreshing to see a couple!

The youngest daughter and her fiancee' are so in sync. One finishes the others thoughts and they move effortlessly together like a well-rehearsed dance team. Don't be fooled into thinking this is a new relationship--they have been exclusive for about 7 years now.

It does my heart good to see the genuine care and concern they have for one another. The little touch on the arm, the hand at the small of her back to guide her up a staircase or through a doorway--these are small gestures that speak volumes.

The future son-in-law arrived home from his IT job and immediately embraces me with a bear hug. I saw him last when he and Miss Jeni helped me prepare the city-girl daughter for the move to Virginia, about a year ago.

After a brief catch-up conversation, we head to the outskirts of Austin. There's a special place that he and Miss Jeni go that provides the most spectacular view of the city. We race against time to catch the sunset.

We arrive with just 10 minutes to spare. After climbing a multitude of rock stairs, I'm encouraged to climb down a series of rock ledges to the ultimate spot.

I decline.

At 50, I have learned the hard way that some things just aren't worth the risk.
When I was in my 20's I would have thought nothing of it. Not now, though. I'm not quite as daring as I once was...

The view is amazing! Lake Austin stretches forever in both directions and the city is an oasis in the distance. I catch the sun as it slips over the horizon.

I can see the two of them below me 30 feet or so. It makes me anxious, but I try not to let on.

Miss Jeni climbs back up, borrows my camera and takes pictures from their vantage point.

I can't wait to share the pictures, but haven't located a mini USB cable to upload the photos.

Marriage is An Outdated Concept

I'm packing up to head to Austin in the wee hours. My youngest has a bridal shower Saturday.

And no, my husband is not driving me to the airport. Is that something a husband should do?? My husband is appalled that I should suggest it.

I cleaned the refrigerator today and planned enough meals so he wouldn't worry the neighbors and his mother while I was gone. I can drive myself the 23 miles to the airport, but... what is a partner for, really???

It's a woman thing, I guess.

I'm waiting on the last load of clothes in the washer and he's fast asleep on the couch. Will he know when I have left?

Were it not for the remaining 4 weeks I have to reach my degree, I'm not sure I would come back.

Does it matter??

Well, the city-girl daughter has re-acquainted herself with tennis and there is a match April 10.
I am anxious to see how she fairs. She will do wonderfully. I will take pictures and share them, I promise.

I Think I Can. I Think I Can.

So I'm 72 hours without nicotine. I'm trying to deal with this 35 year addiction from a psychological approach. So far, so good.

The city girl daughter is cheering me on. She says she wants me to figure it all out so I can tell her how to do it. Isn't that typical of our children??

After making fun of my choice of footwear for some time, she has finally succumbed. She (at least) realized the importance of comfort while she is working.

Hint: Hers are the black... mine are the brown.

Face it, kids are always looking to their parents for direction and / or guidance.

I remember when she confronted me with her first dose of life's disappointments. She was so angry I hadn't warned her. I was blatantly honest when I explained that, had I been privy to a roadmap to life, I would have used it myself.

I remind her (and the youngest daughter) that we need to be ever mindful of the curveballs of life. These are the very ones that have a tendency to hit us square on--in the pit of the stomach, when we least suspect it-- and take the very wind out of our sails.


Doesn't mean we can't recover. Just means we have to be on our toes, so we're better equipped to bounce back, after the inital jolt (or shock).


I'm a firm believer in the fact that we all are limited only by our own thoughts. If you think you can do it, then you can do it. You know, the power of positive thinking and all that stuff.


So I'm hanging in there. Haven't missed a cigarette yet. And I'm hoping for the best.

So, won't you cheer me on?

I'm looking for Version 2

He was quick-witted and often risque. But once you started reading his posts, you inevitably came back for more. It was nothing short of an addiction.

Now, I'm waiting to read his obit. It is my understanding he wrote it some time back, when he learned his days were limited.

I'm trying to not be sad (but my eyes keep welling up).

He was the very reason I started blogging. I came across his blog while doing tech support for a cable company. I emailed him and let him know he had inspired me to start my own.

I will miss him.

But it looks as if my pal Ol Hoss may get another chance, though. Always plotting and planning, he was one step ahead of all of us:

I want to live my next life backwards:

You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in a nursing home and start feeling better each day. Then you get kicked out for being too healthy. Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension.

Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work 40 years until you're too young to work. You get ready for high school: drink alcohol, party, and you're generally promiscuous.

Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, and you have no responsibilities. Then you become a baby.

You spend your last nine months floating peacefully in luxury, in spa-like conditions: central heating, room service on tap, and then....You finish off as an orgasm.

Making Tracks

You should see the all the paw prints, going every which way!

It's up to 24 degrees now. JB and the city girl daughter have both gone to work, leaving me with all the animals.



So now we know why they have all the energy to romp through the house like a herd of buffalo after dark.

Blue, on the other hand, just moves from one place to another, waiting for that fabulous four-letter word: RIDE.

No ride today, I'm afraid. With the snow slowly melting away, I'm devoting my energies to completing assignments...

And I have a new (eight-week) class that starts this evening!

Thank You Mother Nature!

What is it about snow that is so calming to watch?

I made a last-minute store run for necessities and the snow began falling on the drive back home. I watched as it fell diagonally at the windshield, trying hard not to be mesmerized by the patterns whirling right in front of me as I drove.

Once inside the warmth of our home, I was safe to enjoy the view from our many kitchen windows as I prepared a dinner of corned beef and cabbage with lots of carrots and onions. JB made his famous cornbread.

School is cancelled tomorrow! A reprieve--at last.

I'm worse than a teenager in high school, I know. But I promise I will make good use of the extra time.

But for now, I think I'll grab that over-sized afghan the city-girl daughter made for me and pile up with her on the couch to watch a movie.

Turnabout Is Fair Play

I'm still struggling with C++.

I think it may be because I want to use the index rather than reading the text. I'm programmed for shortcuts.

There is no shortcut for programming, I'm afraid.

I was in the midst of this when the youngest called late this afternoon. She sensed the tension in my voice immediately and inquired.

I let it all out. I told her hold this programming class was killing me. I told her how I had fears that this class may do me in and I may not graduate. I told her I just had too much on my plate right now. I was stressed and wasn't sleeping well. I suggested I was pulling a "Jeni" and reminded her of how she had shared the very same apprehensions during her last semester of school.

She laughed-- a deep (knowing) belly laugh.

She then proceeded to relate her memories of her last semester in school and how stressed she had been. She reminisced about how she just knew that being so close to graduation, there would be one prerequisite that she hadn't met-- and she would find out too late! She reminded me of our "brink of disaster" late-night conversations.

She then said she would be "mom"for a minute. She suggested I run a hot bath and soak. Or perhaps I just needed to put school on the back burner for the evening and have a glass of wine and chill. Or better yet, maybe I needed a dose of Rescue Remedy.

These instructions were followed by another deep belly laugh.

I'm not slow... I understood completely what was happening, as quickly as it occurred. But rather be distressed by the role reversal, I'm really quite thrilled.

How nice it is to have your children looking after you.

Broaden Your Mind

I've decided to tackle my demons head on.

I began this good read at the hairdresser's yesterday. I feel better. I'm not sure whether the book should get all the credit, though.

Realizing the power of a good read, I gave JB this book for Valentine's Day.

I appealed to his inner geek and got him a technical manual!

This book has just hit the shelves and is a fabulous find for mothers, sisters, daughters and friends. It's written by best selling author, Gregory Lang and you should get yours now for Mother's Day. It'll make you weep. It'll make you laugh out loud. It will touch your heart.

This book...you'll have to wait a bit longer to hit the shelves.

Pop turned 75 on Thursday and is busy writing his memoirs.
It's still a work in progress.

439 Times in 3 Years

Today is my blogoversary--and I nearly forgot. It took a commenter wishing me a "Happy Blogoversary" to remind me.

I've been too preoccupied with Cisco's WAN exploration class and trying to learn C++ programming via a web class. The stress of the workload is getting to me.

I took a hot shower this morning and tried to decide whether it was stress, lack of yoga, or if I was having a heart attack and just didn't understand the warning signs. I figured I better clean up and fix up just in case it was a heart attack.

JB came home midday to find me all weepy debugging a C++ program. Those of you who understand this language may find my reaction quite silly. But those of you who have no earthly idea about C++, would probably empathize.

After my eyes had leaked sufficiently into my floral handkerchief, I managed to correct 30 errors. I have no idea how--and of course part of the assignment is to document how.

This entire episode reminded me of my Jeni when she was just a little girl. She often practiced piano through tears--pushing herself to the limits of her ability. She played well, but seemed intent on torturing herself by taking on projects meant for more accomplished players. But in the end, she was always victorious.

In middle school, the city-girl daughter made herself physically ill maintaining her high grade point average--as if to do well was not enough, she had to be the best. She was first chair cello in the school orchestra and the Philharmonic Youth Orchestra, and a top-ranked tennis player in the state at the age of 14.

I guess sometimes you just have to find out just what you can do.

I invite you to check out my first blog post, written 3 years ago today. The advice given to me by one of my daughters three years ago still rings true.

But, first I have to get through this semester of school...

Weather Indicater

The city-girl daughter says you can always tell it's cold
if you see Lina with her nose up her ass.

Whatever Gets You Through

The icy cold from yesterday has spilled over into today.
The sky is grey and there's a slight fog rolling in this morning.

It's so beautiful, you almost forget how treacherous it can be.

The hibiscus blooming in my bedroom provides a sharp contrast--
keeping me ever mindful of warmer days and better things to come.

So many textures here!

But for now, I must deal with this a while longer.

Medicinal Purposes

I've gotten into the habit of reading this blog called Proof:

For the past 10,000 years or so, wherever humans have gathered, there has been alcohol. Some never touch the stuff. But most do. It is used to celebrate, commiserate, mourn, remember and, often, to forget. It is different things to different people: libation, anesthetic, emotional crutch, social lubricant, addictive substance, sacred potion, killer or commodity. In "Proof," contributors consider the charms, powers and dangers of drink, and the role it plays in their lives.

If we dig deep enough, or are honest enough, we can see the role alcohol has played in our lives. Good, bad or indifferent--it is what it is.

Today JB says he has a touch of a bug. He has had the sniffles, clears his throat constantly and has had the chills.

But after a couple of beers, a bottle and a half of Reisling, he seems to be feeling much better.

The Turkey Lives

A week ago today, we went down to check on Austin Nichols. And he is doing just fine.
The city-girl even allowed him a peck or two of her hand. He was gracious enough to do a bit of a visit--sans flash.

I just wonder when he will be ready for the real world? Certainly not during spring turkey season! But I also wonder whether it is up to him or those who have become so accustomed to his company...

More Than You Really Need To Know

What is it about others lives that make them so interesting? Could it be part of the grass-is-greener theory, perhaps? Or maybe it's just a welcome diversion from our own life!

My friend Kat from Poetikat's Invisible Keepsakes was recently interviewed by a fellow blogger. She agreed to provide a short interview for me and has tagged me with five questions of her choosing. If you're interested in keeping the interview ring going, see the info at the bottom of this post.

1.What is your philosophy in life?
Keep moving! I'm a bit driven--knowing what needs to get done and driving everyone insane while getting it done. My parents are depression babies, so I was raised with fundamentals of integrity, accountability and responsibility. I was taught to rely on myself, trust my gut instincts and live honestly--expecting no less from those around me. If you strive to live with a clear conscience, it keeps life from becoming complicated.

2.Which plant do you look forward to the most in the Spring?
I'm always in awe of the strength of daffodils and tulips, standing tall against those harsh last traces of winter.

3.What is your absolute favorite thing to cook?
My favorite thing to cook is stir fry. It's quick, nutritious and so colorful. I do enjoy the smell of simmering onions and/or garlic.
But the best part of cooking is the gratitude and appreciation from those who sample the outcome.

4.Tell me one of your most-treasured memories of you and your daughter.
When I was pregnant with my second daughter, the city-girl was just a little over 12 months. I remember how sick I was that first trimester! As I was experiencing the throes of morning sickness, the city-girl daughter would be like an echo, mimicking every sound as I made it. It was pretty funny! It made me realize what a huge responsibility was ahead of me, too.

5.Where were you married?
I married JB right here in our living room beside the Christmas tree in 2001. The local justice of the peace performed the ceremony. We wore jeans and had 2 wedding pictures taken by 1 of the 3 guests that attended.
I've had 2 traditional weddings and have come to the conclusion that it's really not about how it gets done--its more about the two people that are getting married.

Here are the rules:

Here are the instructions if you wish to be interviewed by me:

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me".
2. I will respond by e-mailing you five questions (I get to pick the questions)
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

I will post a list of those who have agreed to an interview so everyone can follow along.